her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
