I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
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