well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize