Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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