shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
