question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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