She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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