yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
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im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
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Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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