Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
