He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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