People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
