Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
She's the barista slut.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
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