Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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