Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
