South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
