but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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