U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
