And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize