That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I think my fart just growled at me.
I skipped work to stalk him.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
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