go do what you do best...puke behind churches
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize