you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
