Don't you send me to vm
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
