I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.