so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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