Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Randomize
