i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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