all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
