what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
