you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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