Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
wow bdsm is so cute
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
