Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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