"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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