so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
