I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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