just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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