we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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