real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
