Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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