You're so nebulous sometimes
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
