Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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