It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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