Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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