Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
