I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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