Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
