Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize