you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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