That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize
