drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
