I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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