just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
